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05 December 2010 @ 06:07 pm
Big Bang Theory/Nightmare Before Christmas 1/1  
Yes, you read that right, it's a Big Bang Theory/Nightmare Before Christmas crossover. In rhyming couplets (which is bloody hard work, I can attest). I wrote it for two reasons that happily coincided: Day five of consci_fan_mo and a birthday fic for ninjababe. Happy birthday Nin! (Ok, so it was actually yesterday, but I tried, ok? *g*). > There is a fully formed fic that I started first, but it ran away with me and is now too long for this comm, so here is the story in poem form. Hopefully I'll finish the actual story and post it at a later date.

Disclaimer: Nothing you recognise is mine, only the insanity. The first two lines are a direct quote from Nightmare Before Christmas.

The Pumpkin Variation

Twas a long time ago, longer now than it seems
In a place that perhaps you have seen in your dreams

Four scientists, geeks, technically men
Went out in the woods, who knows where or when

And it’s there that this story begins as you see
With their discovery of a special tree

It stood in a clearing in the wood
And so, they approached, wondering if they should

For upon each strange tree was carved a door
Of curious shapes that puzzled the four

Each picture represented in a way
One special occasion, one holiday

On one was a Christmas tree, easter egg, turkey
All of the holidays as far as they could see

“But where’s the dreidel?” opined Wolowitz
“It’s here,” replied Raj “Don’t have one of your fits.”

Sheldon declared “We must have a look!”
“It might be dangerous, this isn’t a book.”

Leonard was cautious, as well he might
He didn’t want to die that very night

But Sheldon was set, he couldn’t be moved
It was in the roommate agreement and that could be proved

If a doorway is found to an alternate ‘verse
We must explore, to ignore it is worse


“We must go through this without any pause,
So it is written; the Narnia Clause.”

So they opened the door on a hole big and black
Disappointed, they turned and they started back

But soon came a wind, a terrible vortex
They couldn’t escape, though their muscles did flex

As they tried to hang on, to the trees they clung
But the wind was too strong, inside they were flung

And down they were sucked, miles they did fall
Yet when they landed they weren’t hurt at all

They landed with a thump, but barely a scratch
Their fall interrupted by a big pumpkin patch

Leonard stood up, wiped juice from his face
Then took a good look at this strange new place

The landscape was odd, the colours not right
The ground and the trees were all black and white

“This place is creepy, call me a coward
But I want to go home,” commented Howard

“Home now?” queried Sheldon “But we’ve only begun
We must look around, come on, this is fun!”

“We’ll be boldly going where nowhere has gone
Let’s go, tricorders out and phasers to stun!”

Howard replied “I don’t want to get hurt
It’s bound to occur I’ve got on a red shirt.”

“Dude, just relax,” Raj said “Sheldon is right
At least something good might come of this night.”

Any further debate was put to an end
As they heard footsteps approach from round a bend

Ducking behind a large pumpkin to hide
Our four heroes waited crouched side by side

After a moment or maybe two
A peculiar vision came into view

It looked like a man, skinny and tall
But his head was a skull, had no skin at all

And beside him there floated the ghost of a dog
Our heroes just stared at them, all agog

All reason and logic would say they should go
Yet Sheldon stood up, though Leonard hissed “No!”

He walked forward to greet the strange man and his hound
“Hello,” said the stranger, “I’ve not seen you around.”

“Indeed,” replied Sheldon “We’re new to this locale
I came here by accident, along with my pals.”

“Then welcome my friend, I’m Jack Skellington.”
“Why, hello there, Jack. My name is Sheldon.”

“And hello to you too, there’s no need to crouch down
It’s nice to have visitors to Halloween Town.”

Discovered, the others all stood up too
And went to meet Jack, though afraid what he’d do.

“Halloween Town?” Leonard found courage to say
“That’s right,” replied Jack “Come, it’s this way!”

There was nothing to do but to follow,
So they did, down the road past a hollow

Then they came to a town that was truly bizarre
And were approached by a man in a very strange car

“Jack!” he cried “And who are your friends here?
We really must talk about our plans for next year.”

“This is the mayor,” explained Pumpkin Jack
“He takes care of things, he’s got my back.”

“These three tricksy fellows are Lock and Stock
And this one’s Barrel, it’s his name, don’t mock.”

Jack said as he pointed to three children small
Our four heroes didn’t like them, not even at all

They reminded them all of kids back in school
Who’d picked on the geeks, just to seem cool

Just then there appeared three ghoulish vampires
And a werewolf on a bike with a screech of tyres

“My is that the time?” Leonard declared
“We really should go,” he said sounding scared

The others agreed it was time to depart
“How sad,” said the mayor and gave them his heart

“Thank you,” stammered Leonard, hands dripping with gore
As they turned and left quickly, before they saw more

Once out of sight, so’s not to cause offence
He dropped the organ over a fence

Then the four ran as fast as their legs would allow
For they needed to get home right now

Suddenly they saw they were back in the wood
Safe and sound and that was so good

Howard turned, screamed, then fell on his back
For before him he saw Pumpkin Jack

The others cried out and collapsed like the dead
When they witnessed Jack take off his head

“Bazinga!” Sheldon cried with delight
For he’d given the others all a good fright

And that is the end of this cautionary tale
Of the scientists, wimpy and pale

How they found Halloween Land and all got back
Survived an encounter with dread Pumpkin Jack.
 
 
 
Ninjababe: big-bang1ninjababe on December 5th, 2010 07:14 pm (UTC)
You... Are... Awesome!!!

I love it.

This is exactly how a meeting of the two worlds would be.

My favorite bit is the Narnia Clause.

And, you did very well with the rhyming.

Thanks!!!
But, I don't want to be a pie,: snowidontlikegravy on December 6th, 2010 06:54 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I'm so pleased you liked it :)
donutsweeperdonutsweeper on December 5th, 2010 07:19 pm (UTC)
this is AWESOME

I can't believe you even managed to rhyme Wolowitz!!! :)
But, I don't want to be a pie,: snowidontlikegravy on December 6th, 2010 06:55 pm (UTC)
*snerk* Yeah, that one took me a while to come up with :) Thank you.
Ith: Holiday - Halloween Fang Pumpkinithildyn on December 5th, 2010 07:19 pm (UTC)
I am mega impressed at your rhyming skills! Totally awesome this was :)
But, I don't want to be a pie,: snowidontlikegravy on December 6th, 2010 06:57 pm (UTC)
Why thankee kindly :)

I am attempting one of your prompts, hopefully will appear soon.
The other Weird Alaeron_lanart on December 6th, 2010 11:14 pm (UTC)
I love you! Words cannot express how awesome this is. Narnia Clause had me giggling like a loon and I don't think I stopped until the end...
But, I don't want to be a pie,: happinessidontlikegravy on December 11th, 2010 05:03 pm (UTC)
Thank you honey. Narnia clause was my favourite bit too. You know when you write something that makes you LOL and you just hope everyone else will too? :)
Nona: leverage parker orangephoenix64 on December 7th, 2010 04:37 am (UTC)
Well of COURSE there would be a Narnia Clause. This was great! I also loved the bit where the mayor gave Sheldon his heart.
But, I don't want to be a pie,: pleased hamsteridontlikegravy on December 11th, 2010 05:04 pm (UTC)
Thank you! What would Nightmare be without, well, a little nightmare? :)
Rusty: winterrustydog on December 9th, 2010 05:41 am (UTC)
Hooray, poetry crossover fic! This was so fun. And I loved the Narnia Clause too. :)
But, I don't want to be a pie,: pleased hamsteridontlikegravy on December 11th, 2010 05:06 pm (UTC)
Thank you! That seems to be everyone's favourite bit, even mine!! :)