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21 July 2009 @ 11:20 am
An Immortal Ianto fic 1/1  
This is part of my Immortal Ianto series, the beginning of which can be found here. So, this one's a little more somber than usual, my brain is leaning towards h/c at the moment, which is a novel experience for me. Big thanks to aeron_lanart for her reassurances.

WARNING:Spoiler for Children of Earth, character detail, not plot.

Disclaimer: Torchwood doesn't belong to me, neither does Highlander. Boo.

Each Other's Courage

Jack was mildly concerned when Ianto disappeared from the Hub without saying a word. Ever since the business with Lisa, Ianto had made a habit of announcing when he was going to the Archives, or up to the Tourist Information office, or sometimes even just to the loo. It had become a bit of a running joke between them all, and it had eventually eased Ianto’s guilt on the subject, but the habit had remained.

So when he didn’t return after half an hour, Jack began to get really worried. He knew Ianto hadn’t left the building, he’d gone downstairs, but Amanda wasn’t with him and there was no archiving that needed attention so Jack couldn’t think what was taking him so long.

After forty-five minutes, Jack went looking for him.

He found him in the room that he and Amanda practised in, with his jacket and shirt off; working through some basic Tai-chi Amanda had taught him to focus his mind. Jack stood in the doorway, watching him, until Ianto had finished the kata and come to a standstill.

“Problem?” he asked, startling Ianto.

“How long have you been stood there?” Ianto asked as he fetched his shirt and put it back on. Jack crossed the room to him.

“Long enough to see that something’s bothering you. Talk to me, please?”

Ianto looked at him for a moment or two, seeming to weigh up his options.

“How do you do it, Jack? Keep going, keep living,” he said finally.

Jack released the tension in his muscles that had been building since Ianto left the Hub. He’d been expecting this conversation, sooner or later. In fact, he’d been surprised that Ianto hadn’t brought any of it up sooner.

“What choice do I have? All I can do is live,” he replied, but he regretted the flippancy of the answer almost immediately. Ianto looked almost wounded by it, and Jack realised that his usual dismissive response wasn’t good enough here. “You mean how do I live, right? I don’t, not always. There have been times when all I could manage was to exist, when I thought I’d seen too much, lost too much. Having people like you in my life helps.”

“And when you lose them?”

“It’s hard, I won’t lie to you, and it doesn’t get any easier. But I think that the good times are worth the suffering. Because, Ianto Jones, the alternative is even more unbearable,” Jack answered softly and caressed Ianto’s cheek. Ianto leaned into it and brushed his mouth against Jack’s hand.

Ianto’s cheek was wet and Jack realised with a start that Ianto had been crying. He wiped the tears away and leaned in to kiss Ianto gently on the mouth, a chaste kiss of comfort, before wrapping his arms around him.

“I have family, you know,” Ianto said. “Or rather, I don’t. All these years, and I’m not my father’s son. My sister isn’t even related to me.”

The existence of a sister was news to Jack. He knew that Ianto had a family, but he never really thought about them. Amanda had told him that all Immortals were orphans, which made a kind of sense to Jack, as did the fact that Immortals couldn’t have children. He tried not to think about it too much, but the thought of his daughter growing old and dying was too much to bear some days.

“Blood isn’t the only thing that makes a family, Ianto,” Jack told him.

“No, it doesn’t. But I’m going to have to sever my ties with them, aren’t I? Even if they could accept that I’m Immortal, I’d have to watch them grow old and die. I’m going to lose everyone I care about,” Ianto said. His voice was quiet, Ianto never shouted, but Jack could hear in his voice that he wanted to, and Jack couldn’t blame him.

“Not everyone,” Jack said quietly. Ianto initiated the kiss this time, and it was hard and urgent and needy. Jack kissed him back, letting him know that they were both very much alive, hands seeking to pull the shirt back off again, and then working their way down to Ianto’s trousers. He felt Ianto’s hands tug at his braces and begin unbuttoning his shirt.

They were here, and now, and alive.
The other Weird Al: Torchwood - Jack/Iantoaeron_lanart on July 21st, 2009 01:23 pm (UTC)
Glad you posted this sooner rather than later! I think it's gorgeous, and that last line makes me tear up (in a good way). I like h/c, but not always too much of the hurt bit - at least physically - so this is perfect.
But, I don't want to be a pie,: pleased hamsteridontlikegravy on July 22nd, 2009 07:30 pm (UTC)
Thank you hon, that really means a lot to me and my paranoia ;) It might come off as false modesty or something, but I really do think I'm crap at the mushy stuff, so again, thank you. :)
I will call her George: Highlander Swordstrangevisitor7 on July 21st, 2009 02:02 pm (UTC)
A nice reflective moment and so full of good denial for the fangirls. I am so glad you made him Immortal before the F@#%$n' show attempt to - well you know
But, I don't want to be a pie,: iantoidontlikegravy on July 22nd, 2009 07:31 pm (UTC)

so am I, for once I was ahead of the curve and can write safe in the knowledge that I'm not in Denial. (Watch this space for an Immortal perspective on CoE - once I can bear to watch it again that is!)
tygermamatygermama on July 21st, 2009 04:38 pm (UTC)
Just started watching "Children of Earth" and only got spoiled for one plot point, so I really loved this. Jack and Ianto's relationship is so wonderful and real and canon, so we get to see them kissing!

I love their conversation about why you go on living. I imagine it's one Amanda has had to have more than once too.
But, I don't want to be a pie,: dinobaitidontlikegravy on July 21st, 2009 09:12 pm (UTC)

My sincerest apologies - I sometimes forget about spoilers because I'm so used to being behind on US shows and trying to avoid them myself! Mea culpa.

Thank you very much, I'm glad you enjoyed it and I can only apologise again. :)
tygermamatygermama on July 21st, 2009 11:10 pm (UTC)
Oh No! Don't apologize, I was spoiled on that point before your lovely fic. Sorry to confuse. :) I seem to do that a lot.
But, I don't want to be a pie,: dinobaitidontlikegravy on July 22nd, 2009 06:48 am (UTC)
Ah, I see what's happened here. I was referring to the existence of Jack's family and Ianto's sister as spoiler. Ianto's been Immortal since February, it's got nothing to with CoE. (which I'm very happy about, because since I was already writing the story, it's not Denial!). I probably should have put a link to the rest above, shouldn't I? *grin*
bugeyedmonsterbugeyedmonster on July 21st, 2009 08:10 pm (UTC)
Aww... at least he has Jack to help him. Bittersweet. Ianto had better enjoy his sister while he can.

And since he works for Torchwood, it might be easy for him to never call only write.

Looking forward to more Immortal Ianto. (It makes me smile.)

But, I don't want to be a pie,: immie iantoidontlikegravy on July 22nd, 2009 07:33 pm (UTC)
Thank you! It makes me smile to write it, usually, but I had a bit of angst to work out of me (unsurprisingly). Hopefully it's done now, but there may be more before I can get to the lighter stuff. :)
Rhi: Jack and ianto s3 promovipersweb on July 22nd, 2009 06:53 pm (UTC)
quite a gorgeous piece. I like that Jack is able to reassure Ianto about being immortal and watching people die. I mean, Amanda could do it, but she's his teacher and I don't think it would work as well as it does with Jack, who Ianto knows and loves - or at least likes a lot - and who has dealt with immortality and watching people he loves die for a long time - and yet, still works for Torchwood, which I think is the important part. After all, working for a place where the mortality rate is quite high is not an easy thing.
But, I don't want to be a pie,: immie iantoidontlikegravy on July 22nd, 2009 07:36 pm (UTC)
This is very true.

Thank you, I'm so happy you liked it. As I said above, I don't do this sort of fic often because I genuinely feel I'm rubbish at it. I wrote poetry when I was younger, and I think sometimes I tend to lean to a very poetic kind of language when writing angst and h/c which just comes over as melodramatic in a fic. So, positive comments are genuinely appreciated! :)
Rhi: call me queenievipersweb on July 22nd, 2009 07:38 pm (UTC)
I like angst. Can't write humor very well, but angst and drama? so well. In fact, I got that as a criticism for Schism - a HP/TW crossover. I was told it was too dark and too angsty and too depressing. (I covered cyberwoman to countrycide, which as you know, are quite depressing episodes.)
But, I don't want to be a pie,: writingidontlikegravy on July 22nd, 2009 08:24 pm (UTC)
Between your angst and my crack/fluff/humour, maybe we could find a happy medium! *grin*

Too angsty? No such thing. We all need light and fluffy, but without the dark we wouldn't know what it was. I love a good angsty piece. And that sounds like it needs to be angsty. ;-)

*toddles off to investigate Schism*
The other Weird Alaeron_lanart on July 23rd, 2009 02:00 am (UTC)
Schism is bloody brill and is in no way *too* angsty and depressing.

I like humour *and* angst and am not averse to having them in the same fic!

I can do whimsical (hey, if you attempt an H2G2 xover you've *got* to do whimsical)
I can do angst (I tend to the sorrowful side rather than the angry side)
I'm not so sure I manage light and fluffy that well though.
But, I don't want to be a pie,: deep thoughtidontlikegravy on July 25th, 2009 12:01 am (UTC)
It is indeed bloody brill.

I think you have done fluffy - the crackier side of it admittedly, but you do that light gentle humour well and there have been some lovely moments in your fic that I'd consider light. I guess in the end the whimsy and crack and fluff all kind of blend together, like life.

Us and our categories, eh? *grin*
The other Weird Alaeron_lanart on July 25th, 2009 08:22 am (UTC)
At least they're quaint categories.

Funnily enough, after I wrote that I realised how almost-fluffy some of my shorter things have ended up being, but the only one that was really pink and fluffy involved candy floss on a spaceship.

I'll go with you on the light, then, but I do have to admit being very wary of the insidious power of the fluff side. *g*
But, I don't want to be a pie,: qidontlikegravy on July 25th, 2009 10:17 am (UTC)

The other Weird Al: Torchwood - Jack - laughaeron_lanart on July 25th, 2009 10:20 am (UTC)
Hee! I feel the need to wear my cookies tshirt...
Deaniedeaniebtvs on May 26th, 2011 09:27 pm (UTC)
Brilliantly bittersweet. At least now Jack and Ianto will have each other forever :)
But, I don't want to be a pie,: immie iantoidontlikegravy on May 30th, 2011 07:28 pm (UTC)

I see them drifting in and out of each other's lives, much like Amanda and Duncan do, but yeah, they know that no matter what the other one will be there. :)