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08 December 2010 @ 06:11 pm
Multifandom crack!fic 1/1  
Written for Day 8 of consci_fan_mo, it's all aeron_lanart's fault. She gave me this prompt: Firefly/Doctor Who/Torchwood/Highlander/Buffyverse (feel free to add any more you can think of); coat

What follows is pure crack and completely her fault. Nothing is mine but the insanity.

Coat Club.

Rule One of Coat Club: You do not talk about Coat Club.

Rule Two of Coat Club: You do not talk about Coat Club

The Doctor coughed politely.

“I think you’ll find that rules one and two are the same,” he pointed out.

“I know that, it’s a reference to… oh never mind,” muttered Methos and began crossing out his words.

“Let’s be honest, old man, half the club won’t get the reference anyway,” Captain Jack helpfully added. Methos just grunted.

Rule Two of Coat Club: You do not talk about Coat Club All members must own at least one floor-length coat.

Rule Three of Coat Club: Coats must be worn at all times.

Rule Four of Coat Club: No swishing of coat during Coat club.

“Seriously? But it looks so cool,” Jack said with a pout to general agreement from the room. Methos sighed.

Rule Four of Coat Club: No unnecessary swishing of coat during Coat club.

“Do we really need so many gorram rules?”

Methos stopped and glared at Mal for a second and then grinned.

“Not much for rules myself,” Methos conceded. Spike nodded enthusiastically.

“Great, so what exactly is this club for then?” he asked as he lit up a cigarette. The Doctor pulled it from his mouth and tutted. Mitchell hastily put away the one he'd been about to light for himself and Sherlock rubbed absently at the patch on his arm.

“Simple, this is a place where all the long-suffering, long-coat wearing heroes, anti-heroes and various other protagonists of genre can come, relax and have a chat with like minded people,” he explained. There were general looks of confusion and disappointment. “And a free bar,” he added with a resigned sigh.

There was a stampede in the direction of the bar, leaving the Doctor feeling a little alone and out of place. A polite cough from behind caught his attention.


"Hmm, is a cloak really a long coat? We need to discuss this," Sherlock called from the bar. The Doctor nodded in agreement, but the others in the room were all in favour of letting Death in their club anyway.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door. It opened and in walked Harry Dresden.

“Is this the place for Coat Club?”

Black Rook: cutiegrachonok on December 8th, 2010 06:15 pm (UTC)
Didn't understand half of it, but liked it nevertheless!:)

Edited at 2010-12-08 06:15 pm (UTC)
But, I don't want to be a pie,: crossoversidontlikegravy on December 8th, 2010 06:19 pm (UTC)
Thank you! But actually, I posted too soon, come back again in about ten minutes! :)
Black Rook: cutiegrachonok on December 8th, 2010 07:25 pm (UTC)
:) Of course, wouldn't be a good club without them two!
But, I don't want to be a pie,: being humanidontlikegravy on December 8th, 2010 07:36 pm (UTC)
That's what occurred to me as I was posting it! :)
later_tuesday: lg kenzi smilelater_tuesday on December 8th, 2010 08:22 pm (UTC)
LOL. I love xovers that are just a clusterfuck of shows. Well played.
But, I don't want to be a pie,: pleased hamsteridontlikegravy on December 11th, 2010 05:07 pm (UTC)
LOL, thank you :)
The other Weird Al: Torchwood - all about the coataeron_lanart on December 8th, 2010 11:06 pm (UTC)

I'm still laughing - you killed me completely with the last couple of lines. *huggles Harry for being his usual kind of dense self*

Of course there's a free bar, that would be the first thing Methos sorted out!

Now I have the thankless task of deciding which coat-related icon to use...
But, I don't want to be a pie,: sherlocks propertyidontlikegravy on December 11th, 2010 05:09 pm (UTC)
...and we're back to the Nikolai Dante crossover again. Damn you. *g*

Thank you so much. I was really worried about this one, just because it made my sick mind laugh doesn't mean it would work for anyone else!

The other Weird Al: Evil Club - crossfandom bunniesaeron_lanart on December 11th, 2010 05:44 pm (UTC)
Blame wiki for Nikolai Dante - I can't help the way my crossover inclined brain works when subjected to a visual cue like that!
I'm a walking doodle: Highlander/Methosmad_jaks on December 11th, 2010 05:33 pm (UTC)
HEEE! I was really worried that Rule 4 was going to stand. I'm glad Jack objected *G*

Right this instant, I can't figure out what tags it's missing for the comm, but I'll come back to it later (several times).
But, I don't want to be a pie,: pleased hamsteridontlikegravy on December 11th, 2010 05:38 pm (UTC)
Thank you!

(I just thought it could use a crossover:multifandom, or crack!fic tag, but moderator's choice *g*)
I'm a walking doodle: conscifancowmad_jaks on December 11th, 2010 06:08 pm (UTC)
Gotcha! *makes a note*
Rusty: captain jackrustydog on December 12th, 2010 03:41 pm (UTC)
HEE! Love how you handled this idea, and the bit with the smokers vs the nonsmokers made me giggle a lot. :)
But, I don't want to be a pie,: richie smileidontlikegravy on December 15th, 2010 05:13 pm (UTC)
Thank you kindly :)
Kethrynoirrosaleen on November 4th, 2011 07:57 pm (UTC)

Yea, just TRY and make Sherlock and Jack not swish...*lol* Love this! And Surprise!Harry!