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08 March 2008 @ 06:16 pm
Browncoats and Scabbards Part 6/?  
Part 5 of my Highlander/Firefly Crossover, which you can read from the beginning starting here. This is my first foray into the world of Mal Reynolds et al, so I brought Richie and Methos along for the ride. Yes I know that makes this denial so I apologise to any purists but he's my puppy and I love him. ;p  
It isn't slash and I hope it isn't OOC at any point.
Any and all comments gratefully received, just try not to be too cruel.

I don't own Highlander or Firefly or any of the characters that you recognise, I'm just partying with them for a while and I promise to clean up after myself.

Big thanks to strangevisitor7for her help as beta on this chapter.

Since it's been a while, a quick catch up: Richie and Methos have been pressganged into helping the Alliance capture River and are aboard the shuttle of Captain MacLeod searching for Serenity. Meanwhile Serenity is running low on just about everything. Desperate, Mal has agreed to return to Lilac to try robbing the payroll again. En route they receive a distress call, which River moves to intercept. They find a shuttle being attacked by two Reaver ships. We now go back a few minutes and join our Immortal friends aboard that shuttle....

Browncoats and Scabbards 6
“What do you mean; we’ve only got one gun on this crate? How did you expect to capture River with only one weapon?” Methos demanded.
“I knew we wouldn’t get close in an armed Alliance ship. Besides, we don’t want a pitched space battle, we need to get up close for the capture,” Duncan replied, calmly but quickly pressing buttons.
“Well, that’s just marvellous. Going up against them with a pea-shooter like that would be like David vs. Goliath. And trust me, despite the propaganda, David didn’t win that one. So it looks like we’re all about to become Reaver-bait. Any ideas?” Methos asked.
“Besides letting them kill us? Not at the moment, no,” Duncan retorted.
“Oh that’s a wonderful suggestion. You do know what Reavers do to people don’t you? I suspect that would be permanent even for us!” Richie shouted.
Duncan focussed on the screen in front of him, and Methos glared at Richie. Richie was confused for a moment, until he realised what he had said. He’d forgotten that pirates had treated Duncan’s family the way the Reavers treated victims. “Oh, Mac, I’m sorry…I didn’t…”
Duncan shook his head, as though shaking away the bad memories.
“It’s not important right now Rich,” he said quietly. “I’ve jammed their coms and sent out a distress call, but I doubt there’s anyone out this far willing to come to our aid. So our only course left is to run.”
“Always been my favoured option,” Methos joked, grimly. Duncan punched a few buttons and turned the shuttle around, heading away from the oncoming ships as fast as the shuttle’s engine could manage.
After a few moments, Duncan examined a screen on the console and swore.
“If either of you has some fancy flying skills that I’m unaware of, now would be the time to let me know. The Reavers are gaining on us, and this ship won’t go any faster without tearing the engine apart.”
“Let me have the controls,” Richie demanded, stepping forward. Duncan looked at him sceptically.
“He’s a fair flyer MacLeod. Let him try,” Methos said with a shrug. Duncan stood up and allowed Richie to take the pilot’s chair.
Richie barrel-rolled the ship, before swinging her around the nearest moon, using the gravity to slingshot back towards the Reavers.
“Not to sound like I don’t have faith in your piloting, but what the hell are you doing nansheng?” Methos asked, a note of concern in his voice.
“Chill, old timer, it’s shiny. We’ll slingshot out, increasing our top speed temporarily. By the time they realise and react, we’ll have vanished into that gas cloud,” Richie replied, indicating a patch of space on the monitor. “Slam on the brakes, and they’ll fly right by,” he finished with a grin.
“I hope you’re right, Maverick,” Methos said, getting the reference to Top Gun. Even after five centuries, Richie was a walking talking reference section on twentieth century cinema. Methos had definitely been socialising with the boy too long.
“I feel the need, the need for speed,” Richie said, his grin becoming broader. Duncan leaned forward and glared at him.
“Do you think you could can the outdated movie references and concentrate on keeping us alive?” he asked.
“Some people have no respect for the classics. Won’t happen again, Captain MacLeod,” Richie answered, loading enough bile into the word Captain to make it sound insulting.
The shuttle shot past the Reaver ships, exactly as Richie had predicted, leaving them no time to react. The shuttle vanished into the nearby gas cloud. Once they were in deep, Richie brought them to a stop. He turned to look at Duncan and Methos, a smug smile on his face.
“Don’t look so happy. We haven’t lost them yet,” Duncan said.
“The Reavers have crappy old technology. No way will their sensors be able to detect us in here. We can just sit here, watch our sensors. Soon as they get bored and fly off, we can vamoose in the opposite direction,” Richie told him confidently.
“I hate to put a dampener on your brilliant plan,” Duncan interrupted, “But they’ve followed us in,” he finished, pointing to the screen. Richie and Methos followed his finger and saw two ships closing on their position.
“Guess Reavers scavenge a better class of ship these days,” Methos commented.
“Not helpful,” Richie said, grabbing the controls again and piloting them back into open space.
“Richie, head for that moon. According to the charts, it’s inhabited; maybe we’ll find help there. At the very least, we stand a better chance against them on the ground than in the air,” Duncan instructed. Richie nodded and headed for the moon.
“Are you fohng luh? You want the three of us to take on two ships of Reavers? If we die…” Methos argued.
“There may be no coming back. I know,” Duncan confirmed.
“Between us, there’s six and a half millennia of experience and knowledge, not even counting the Quickenings we’ve taken. With no Immortal to take our Quickenings, it will all be gone, forever,” Methos said. Duncan and Richie were both surprised by his words. It wasn’t like Methos to be so philosophical.
“But that’s six and a half millennia of experience in the Game. There’s no one I’d rather have next to me in a stand up fight,” Duncan reasoned. Methos sagged, knowing he’d lost the argument. Duncan turned to Richie. “Look, Rich, I don’t want any bad blood between us. If this is the end…”
“Don’t go getting all mushy on me now, big guy. They’re right behind us, and closing fast. Kao! We’re not gonna make planetfall.”
“Then there’s nothing left for it. I’ll make ready the pea-shooter,” Duncan said grimly before he dropped into the co-pilot seat and readied the shuttle’s gun. Suddenly the scanner blipped. Duncan looked at it. “Looks like a ship has answered our call. One of the Reaver ships has gone to greet it.”
“Tell me it’s a battle cruiser,” Methos said hopefully. Duncan started to laugh, which caused the other two to look at him warily. “What? What’s so funny?” Methos asked.
“It’s Serenity.”
In that moment of distraction, the remaining Reaver ship opened fire, a lucky shot that disabled the shuttle’s engine.
“Good news, Mac,” Richie joked, wrestling with the controls, “Look’s like we’ll make planetfall after all.”
Mal Reynolds was dimly aware that the Alliance shuttle was hit and entering the atmosphere of the moon. He had slightly more pressing concerns at the present, namely the safety of his ship and crew. The only reason the shuttle’s descent registered with him at all was that, if the other Reaver ship chose not to pursue it down, Serenity would be facing two ships instead of the one currently heading toward them.
Mal grabbed the controls, thinking fast. No sense in trying to outrun them. No sense, but it was their best chance.
“Simon!” he called. Simon nodded, his face determined, and stepped forward to sedate River with her ‘safe phrase’. But before he could, he was sent crashing to the deck as the ship rocked violently.
“We’re hit,” Jayne commented.
“I kinda noticed,” Mal replied. He examined a screen in front of him and cursed. “Engine’s hit. No way we can outrun them now. River, fly toward the moon,” he instructed. Since Mal now wanted to do the same thing she did, River agreed happily. “Kaylee, you reckon you’re ready to test this notion of yours?”
“Absotively,” Kaylee confirmed.
“Then get.”
“Looks like our luck hasn’t changed; the second ship’s headed this way,” Jayne pointed out.
Dahng ran. Jayne, make yourself useful and go help her,” Mal commanded, indicating the retreating form of Kaylee. Jayne began to protest, then thought better of it and mutely followed Kaylee to the engine room.
“Captain?” Zoe said inquisitively.
“Kaylee’s got this fohng luh idea that she can overload the engines, creating an EMP that’ll disable anything chasing us. It unfortunately disables us too, so River flies us in close to the planet, they give chase, we knock out their engines, they crash and die.”
“And you think this is the best time to test Kaylee’s theory?” Simon asked.
“Can you think of a better one? I’m all out of ideas here, so this is what we’re doing.”
“Simple but effective. And so crazy it just might work,” Zoe said with a smile. Mal smiled back.
“It’s what we do best,” he agreed.
River piloted Serenity towards the moon, barely ahead of their pursuers.
“Kaylee?” Mal called over the com.
Just a couple of minutes,” came her reply, “Need to let the feedback build or it wont be big enough.
Not the first time she’s said that,” Jayne said lasciviously, followed by a muffled thud and “Ow!” as Kaylee hit him.
Serenity entered the atmosphere at speed a few minutes later, hotly pursued by the Reavers.
“How ‘bout we give em the run around, give Kaylee a few more seconds?” Mal suggested. River nodded and pulled the ship out of her dive, into a barrel roll, before looping the loop over the Reaver ships, heading back into the black. The damaged engine whined with a combination of Kaylee’s overload and the strain of trying to break free of gravity.
The Reavers turned and began to chase them back out. At the edge of the atmosphere, River reduced the power, letting the ship freefall back toward the surface, past the Reavers, before increasing power again to control the descent. She continued to head straight for the ground, nose first.
Mal was never one to put much faith in luck or divine providence, but he hoped sincerely that some sort of deity was looking out for them at that precise moment. When they were one minute from impact, he yelled at the com,
A few more seconds.
“Don’t got em. It’s now or never. River, cut all power, or we’ll get fried along with them,” he instructed. River obeyed, sending Serenity into freefall once again. “Kaylee, do it!”
As Serenity continued her nose dive toward the ground, River pulled back with all her might on the controls, trying to control the descent. There was a judder as the EMP fired. River managed to get the nose up, and Serenity unceremoniously belly-flopped onto the ground, flinging her crew across the various cabins and onto the deck.
A few seconds later, two explosions confirmed that Kaylee’s plan had worked, as the Reaver ships ploughed into the terrain and blew up. Mal pulled himself to his feet and looked out at the two mile-high columns of smoke. He smiled and let out the breath he hadn’t realised he was holding.
Shungsheng duh gaowahn; it worked!” Jayne exclaimed, staggering back into the cockpit.
“Never doubted it for a second,” Kaylee said, following him through the door, positively beaming. “Zoe?” she added, concern on her face. The others looked toward Zoe to see she was still slumped on the floor, blood flowing from a cut on her forehead.
Simon rushed to her side and checked her over.
“She’ll be okay, it’s just superficial. I’ll take her down to the infirmary and patch her up,” he said, helping Zoe to her feet.
“I’m fine, Captain,” Zoe said, pushing Simon away, before swaying and losing her footing. Simon caught her and hefted her upright again. “Perhaps a quick trip to the medical bay…” she added sheepishly. Mal nodded and helped Simon escort her to the door. Once she was gone, he turned to the others to give out orders.
“Kaylee, take a look see, find out just how much of a jung chi duh go-se dway we’re in, and how long it will take to repair. Get Simon and Zoe to help when they can. Jayne, River, you’re with me,” he instructed and headed out of the cockpit toward the cargo bay, Jayne and River following behind.
“Where exactly are we going?” Jayne asked.
“To check the wrecks,” Mal replied, checking his gun.
“We’re looking for survivors?” River said happily. Jayne snorted with laughter.
Fay-fay duh pee-yen! Won’t be any survivors. Reckon there might be salvageable parts though,” he said. Mal glared at him before saying gently to River,
“That shuttle went down hard and fast. It’s impossible that anyone could survive a crash like that,” he explained. River just smiled enigmatically.

Continues in Part Seven
Chinese translations:
nansheng – schoolboy
fohng luh – crazy in the head
kao – f**k
dahng ran – Of course.
shungsheng duh gaowahn – holy testicle Tuesday
jung chi duh go-se dway – steaming crap pile
fay-fay duh pee-yen – a baboon’s a**crack

Ith: Methos - Buzzithildyn on March 8th, 2008 07:05 pm (UTC)
That was a lot of fun! (see? no cruelty [g])
But, I don't want to be a pie,: painty methosidontlikegravy on March 8th, 2008 07:09 pm (UTC)
Indeed, cruelty free. *g*

Thanks, glad you enjoyed it. :)
Kay: mal&kaylee -- oh captain!silvercobwebs on March 8th, 2008 07:12 pm (UTC)
Great stuff! I love the easy dialogue (and fantastic creative swearing *g*) between both sets of characters - absolutely no OOCness that I can see whatsoever. You write a fab bit of action! : )
But, I don't want to be a pie,: captain my captainidontlikegravy on March 10th, 2008 07:28 pm (UTC)
Cool, thank you very much *beams*.

fantastic creative swearing
I might add that to my CV under language skills. ;-D
Tiger Lily: Highlandertigerlily0 on March 8th, 2008 10:30 pm (UTC)
I'm enjoying this and anxious to see what happens next!
But, I don't want to be a pie,: richie smileidontlikegravy on March 10th, 2008 07:26 pm (UTC)
Thanks. I hope that there won't be a big gap this time, but I say that every time so I apologise in advance. *g*
Sophie: Methossophiedb on March 8th, 2008 11:38 pm (UTC)
No survivors? Bwahahahaha!
But, I don't want to be a pie,: painty methosidontlikegravy on March 10th, 2008 07:25 pm (UTC)