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07 June 2008 @ 06:35 pm
Birthday fic for holde_maid!  
A House/Holby City/(Highlander if you want it to be) crossover, a pure bit of cracky fluff. 
Summary: Cuddy makes House entertain a potential new recruit for the hospital. A certain English surgeon by the name of Clifford…

A/N: Happy Birthday holde_maid for the 9th! This is for you, with much affection.

Disclaimer: Not mine, none of it, or House would be with Wilson and Dan would be Methos. 

A Meeting of Minds

House stormed into Cuddy’s office and slammed a piece of paper onto her desk.

“What the hell is this? Since when do I need a consult?!” he demanded. Cuddy looked up at him with her usual exasperation.

“Nobody said you need a consult, House. The board want me to try and woo Doctor Clifford into joining our staff,” she replied with a sigh. She instantly regretted saying it when she saw the lascivious grin appear on House’s face.

“Woo? Just how do you intend to woo him? And can I watch?” he asked lecherously. Cuddy ignored him and stood up, gathering some papers and walking to the door. House followed, staring openly at her rear.

“Stop staring at my ass,” Cuddy said.

“Wow, that is some gift for clairvoyance you’ve got there. Come on, tell me you’re hiding a mirror in that enormous bosom,” House said. Cuddy stopped and turned to him.

“Look, just play nice with Doctor Clifford. Show him what an excellent hospital this is and why he’d be mad to turn down our offer,” she instructed.

“Fine,” House said and headed toward the elevators. “But don’t be surprised if playtime ends in tears. I don’t play well with others!” he called back over his shoulder.

Cuddy put her head in her hand. This was probably not going to end well.

House limped back to his office to find a tall, thin man seated at his desk, studying the contents of his ipod. As he entered, the man looked up.

“You must be Greg House. Dan Clifford. Interesting playlist you’ve got there,” Clifford said, an amused look on his face. House scowled.

“And an apparently comfy chair,” House commented. Clifford laughed.

“Of course, sorry. Your reputation precedes you, probably the finest diagnostician in the world,” he replied as he got up and moved out of House’s way. House sat down and Clifford took a seat opposite, his amused look not altering, which irritated House.

“There’s no probably about it. And there’s no need to suck up to me, the job’s yours if you want it,” House said.

“This isn’t some kind of test then?” Clifford asked. House smiled.

“Oh, it’s always a test,” he replied. Clifford chuckled. “Cuddy wants you to observe my team at work. But you might as well make yourself useful. Assuming you’re not an idiot.”

“You really are a people person, aren’t you? Well, I’m here for a week, might as well make it interesting. What are you working on?” Clifford replied casually.

“At the moment? Nothing. But something always shows up. In the meantime…” House stopped mid-sentence, stood up and walked to the door. Dan watched him, curious. House stopped at the door, turned back and beckoned Clifford with his head. Dan stood up and followed House to coma-guy’s room.

“Patient of yours?” Dan asked, walking to the bed and picking up the chart. House flopped into the nearest chair and picked up the remote.

“Nope,” he replied and flicked on the TV. “Time for my stories. I’m hoping that Anna is about to confess to Julio that she used to be a man.”

“You sneak into a coma patient’s room to watch soap operas?” Clifford asked, incredulous. House opened a drawer and pulled out a bag of nachos that he began eating. At the look on Clifford’s face he offered him the bag.

“Nacho?” he asked. Dan looked at the proffered bag for a moment before taking one, and then he sat down on the chair on the opposite side of coma-guy’s bed. He asked,

“So, Anna used to be a man?” 


A/N 2: no I am not writing any more of this. If someone else wants to carry it on, I am more than happy to give my blessings, but I've too many WIPs as it is! [g]

Sophie: Methossophiedb on June 7th, 2008 07:21 pm (UTC)
*snigger* Maddy, Cuddy, Maddy, Cuddy.. hmmm.. I wonder if Dan really did make to Brussels, or wherever it was he said he was going :)
But, I don't want to be a pie,: dan cliffordidontlikegravy on June 8th, 2008 04:16 pm (UTC)

Haven't seen you lately, everything ok?
Sophiesophiedb on June 9th, 2008 07:37 am (UTC)
Yep, fine - just busssssssssssssssssssssy, especially now that Katelyn is crawling and climbing.. *eep*
Improbable Girlstarcrossedgirl on June 8th, 2008 05:30 pm (UTC)
Teheee. I rather have the suspicion that Dan and House would get on like, uhm, the proverbial house on fire. They've got enough testosterone to send Princeton Plainsborough into the upper stratosphere together! :)
I will call her George: Happy Methosstrangevisitor7 on June 8th, 2008 08:05 pm (UTC)
I loved this and demand more but you already know that!
holde_maid: hidingholde_maid on June 9th, 2008 07:03 am (UTC)

Oooh, just what I needed! Thank you!